music was my first love

i love love love music.. because it's just something that has been with me for all my life and the only thing i'm really good at. i kinda rediscover german music like wir sind helden, mia, juni, .. i love the lyrics and just the sound. electro/indie/pop/something.
today was a good day i guess.. maybe not if it comes to my looks but the rest of it. pretty nice. i'm gonna go skiing with my dad this weekend. i'm scared that we'll fight a lot but usually it's nice if it's only him and me without all the stress.
sometimes i think i'm so different than everybody else that it hurts but then i read blogs and it's like everybody thinks the same. so we can't we all be honest and everybody would feel a little more understood. ?
i love people and deep conversations. i love drawing when i'm not under pressure. i love writing when it just comes and i don't think and my pen just moves over the paper. i love listening to music when i'm not in a hurry to do anything dumb.
i love germany and my friends there and i miss them so so so so so much. i don't think you can imagine if you've never been somewhere else for such a long time. i wish people were a little more "constant". like you know one day you feel that there's like this great chemistry between you and somebody else and the next day you're like two strangers. why is that ? i'm bounding when i really like somebody and that's horrible cause it hurts and is annoying and hard for the other person but what can i do ?
i'm gonna look at prom dresses now (although i don't have a date) :) :)